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droseinterview

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1. Why do you think you have a type of autism?

 Because from a young as I can remember, maybe 3 – I have always been awfully socially I’m polite nice etc but unless I know exactly what’s happening or what I am suppose to be doing I get extremely anxious and just don’t seem to be able to mix. Once I’m talking to someone I feel ok but if other people join in or that person goes away I feel totally stranded. Till I was about 30, I put it down to being brought up in isolated countryside but other things have happened which make me think it’s something else as well. I find many things contradictory even myself. Having seen several documentaries about Autism, Tourettes, Aspergers, D.I.D.s etc.  I can relate to so many of the people with these conditions and particularly Aspergers. An American woman in a documentary said she felt like ‘spock’ or something that really struck a cord with me as I used to say to my best friend that I felt like ‘spock’ or something. I used to play football nearly all the time aged 3 – 25. Because I loved it and it was my main way of having friends. When we finished I was at a loss. I didn’t seem to know what to talk about apart from football, nature/animals, TV etc. Later at work I was happy as larry when I knew what I was doing but anxious/lost when work finished or changing. There are a lot of reasons, but these are the main ones.


 2. Explain to me the strange things that have happened to you.

 I’ve seen 6 or 7 UFO sightings probably a dozen in all but others could have been fireballs, meteors or natural phenomenon.


 3. Where did you see the UFO sightings and when?

 First and best one was where we lived 69-79 Hinksford Waterworks Cottage and witnessed by my brother and cousin. Another was at our house in Wednesbury in the early 80’s by my mom who called dad and me outside to see. Another one was at Sandwell Valley which myself, mom and dad all saw for at least 20 minutes. A dark sphere; then 2 triangular objects darting side to side behind it. I saw a cylindrical object from a street just up the road from my here in Wombourne/Wolverhampton. Then, while walking in the countryside I took a photo of 2 Buzzards and very similar object turned out on the photograph.


 4. What sort of paranormal things have happened to you? Tell us about your hyper sensitive thing to.

 Some of my paranormal experiences are the UFO sightings, I’ve had at least 2 succubus encounters, several de-ja-vu and E.S.P experiences, sleepwalked and I could see inside and outside my mom and dads bedroom in a pure white light. Next morning they said the light wasn’t on and they saw me come into the room. I heard them ask whether it was me but I didn’t answer.


 5. Do you feel that people should be more like you to make the world a better place? i.e Unmaterialistic, have respect for our planet and animals.

 Yes


 6. Do you feel that because you put others before yourself when you defend others that you make yourself look bad for sticking up for them? Do you normally get the blame?

 Yes


 7. How do you feel when you get over whelmed with too many people around you? Does it make you ill or just really worried?

 When I’m over whelmed in company of over 4 or 5 people. I go into my shell so to speak. I love analogies. And then find it very hard to speak. I feel like I’m being observed/watched and assessed etc and feel extremely self-conscious. I don’t know who to look at or concentrate on as it feels like I’m ignoring all others so I kind of go into a daze to shut out talk and looks from all directions.


 8. Tell me why you think that what you’ve been told and found out about Aspergers etc seems contradictory and a ‘cop out’?

 I feel some things about Autism and Aspergers are contradictory because a lot are even married, have qualified jobs etc. Also I think I could’ve been capable of a lot more especially if I’d have met a nice /woman.


 9. What do you think of the doctors and mental health places you’ve been involved with?

 For a couple of years I’ve tried to find out if I actually have Aspergers and one places fobs one off to another doctor, mental health clinic, psychologist, psychiatrist etc. Then you get a letter saying there isn’t actually a test for Aspergers and you can self diagnose. Well I feel I have the condition or I’m a human/alien hybrid. In my case none have been any help as yet since 2003. I’m currently awaiting to see someone.


 10. How do you feel being in that vicious circle you talked about in your story. Do you really wish very much you could get out of it?

 Well I feel in absolute limbo. I have always wished I could get out of this situation I’ve had jobs, motorbikes, friends, been to concerts, football, speedway, cinema, day trips etc but always felt lonely deep inside. I am convinced that if I met a true friend/soulmate I would be happy.